My Band (D12)
[Intro]
[Eminem]: I dunno dude
I think everybody's all jealous and shit
Cuz I'm like, the lead singer of the band, dude
And I think everybody's got a fuckin' problem with me, dude
And they need to take it up with me after the show
Because...
[Chorus]
These chicks don't even know the name of my band
But they're all on me like they wanna hold hands
Cuz once I blow they know that I'll be the man
All because I'm the lead singer of my band
So I get on stage, right? Drop the mic
Walk up to these hot chicks and I'm all like,
"Sup, ladies? My name's Slim Shady
I'm the lead singer in D12, baby"
They're all like, "Oh my God, it's him!
Becky oh my fuckin' God it's Eminem!"
"I swear to fuckin' God, dude, you fucking rock
Please, Marshall, please, let me suck your cock!"
And by now, the rest of the fellas get jealous
Especially when I drop the beat and do my acapellas
All the chicks start yellin', all the hot babes
Throw their bras and their shirts and their panties onstage
So like every single night they pick a fight with me
And when we fight it's kinda like sibling rivalry
Cuz they're back onstage the next night with me
Dude, I just think they're tryin' to steal the light from me
Yesterday Kuniva tried to pull a knife on me
Cuz I told him Jessica Alba's my wife to be
This rock star shit, it's the life for me
And all the other guys just despise me
Because these...
[Chorus]
My band, my band, my band, my band, my band, my band
My band, baby yeah
[Swift]
You just wanna see a n***a backwards, don't you?
Hey Dad, how come we don't rap on Protools?
Smash these vocals and do a performance
But we in a van and he in a tour bus
You don't want my autograph, you's a liar
And no, I'm Swift
[Kon Artis]: Oh, I thought you were Kuniva
And what the hell is wrong with that dressin' room?
Cuz my shit is lookin' smaller than a decimal
See I know how to rap, it's simple but
All I did was read a Russell Simmons book
So I'm more intact, tryin' to get on the map
Doin' jumpin' jacks while gettin' whipped on my back
[Kon Artis]: Look at Em, little punkass, thinkin' he's the shit
[Kuniva]: Yeah I know man, by himself takin' all the flicks
[Kon Artis]: Hey, I thought we had an interview with D.J. Clue
[Eminem]: No, I had an interview, not you two
[Kuniva]: You gon' be late for soundcheck
[Kon Artis]: I ain't goin' to soundcheck!
[Kuniva]: Man, our mics are screwed up
[Kon Artis]: And his always sound best!
You know what man, I'ma say somethin'
[Kuniva]: Ay yo Em!
[Eminem]: You got somethin' to say?
[Kon Artis]: Man, no!
[Kuniva]: I thought you was about to tell him off, man, what's up?
[Kon Artis]: Man, I'ma tell him when I feel like it, man, shut up
And you ain't even back me up, we supposed to be crew!
[Kuniva]: Man, I was about to talk right after you! I swear! I swear, man!
[Chorus]
[Proof]
They say the lead singers rock but the group does not
Once we sold out arenas to the amusement park
I'm gonna let the world know that Proof is hot
I should cut his mic off when the music starts
[Eminem]: Ay yo what's --
Ready to snap on a dumbass fan
Every time I hear
[Fan]: Hey dude, I love your band!
We ain't a band, bitch, we don't play instruments
So why he get ninety and we only get ten percent?
And these guys, they keep finding every area code
[Eminem]: Proof, carry my bag!
Bitch, carry your own
Can't make it to the stage, security in my way
[Voices] (Ohhhh) Who the fuck are you?
Where's Obie and Dre?
[Bizarre]
Goddammit I'm sick of this crew
Time for me to go solo and make some loot
I told you I made the beats and wrote all the raps
Until Kon Artis slipped me some crack
Lose Yourself video, I was in the back
Superman video, I was in the back
Fuck the media, I got some suggestions
Fuck Marshall, ask us the questions
Like who is D12, how'd we get started
[Newscaster]: But what about Eminem?
Bitch, are you retarded?
Anyway, I'm the popularest guy in the group
Bigass stomach, bitches think I'm cute
50 told me to do situps to get buff
Did two and a half and couldn't get up
Fuck D12, I'm outta this band
I'm gonna start a group with the real Roxanne
[Eminem]
Girl why can't you see you're the only one for me
And it just tears my ass apart to know that
You don't know my name
[Bizarre]
These chicks don't even know the name of my band (haha!)
But they're all on me like they wanna hold hands (fuck Marshall)
Cuz once I blow I know that I'll be the man (yeah!)
All because I'm the lead sing....
[Eminem & Bizarre]
My band, my band, my band...
[Bizarre]
We the hottest boy band ever!
D12!
[Eminem]
I'm the lead singer of my band
I get all the girls to take off their underpants
I'm the lead singer of my band
My salsa makes all the pretty girls want to dance, my salsa
Look out for my next single, it's called My Salsa
My salsa, salsa, salsa, salsa
My salsa makes all the pretty girls want to dance and take off their underpants
My salsa makes all the pretty girls want to dance and take off their underpants, my salsa
Where'd everybody go?